How I Decide When To Fire A Client
Playing with your intuition
One of the most difficult aspects of running my own shop has been firing clients. I know myself, and I know when relationships start to feel gross. And when that happens, I get itchy to end them.
The past few years, I’ve been working my way back to acting on my intuition. That is not always easy.
If you’re like me, you may have spent a lot of years ignoring the hits you get.
Weird vibes from the first call you couldn’t quite place, but also $$$
Out-of-scope asks
A general disregard of your time, including things like scheduling extra meetings, paying you late, or assholey/shady behavior
Sometimes, client relationships start off beautifully and become these things, which is particularly jarring.
Many of my previous jobs + life trained me out listening to my intuition. What’s the point when you’re beholden to someone else’s vision anyway? became my subconscious soundtrack.
But, now that I’m in year 6 (!) of my business, it was time to stop nervously hand-wringing for months and whining about the size of a monthly check while accepting weird vibes.
So, when I decided I’d shorten the previously months-long anxiety spiral prior to ending a client relationship, I asked for guidance. Out loud.
I sat down, took a few breaths, and asked for a specific sign.
Specificity is key.
“Show me,” I said, “The signs for ‘stay’ and ‘go.’”
Immediately, I was presented—in my mind’s eye— with a red star for stay and a green star for go. I said “Thank you” and moved on with the rest of my day, eager to see what would present.
These magical things don’t always happen quickly, but they did for me that day. I went to pick up my kids from school soon after asking for my specific signs, and right in front of me sat a trash bin with a huge red star on it.
If anything, I expected the green. I was ready to fire, to go, to throw up the deuces, to make room.
I could have, but I decided to play along.
While I waited for the preschool staff to bring out my kids, I smiled and thanked my team—out loud. I whispered it to myself so none of the other moms could hear me, not that that mattered.
But this was for me, not for them.
Two months passed before I got my green star, and it showed up in a way I certainly couldn’t have imagined.
We live in a house full of piles that essentially get moved around every day. We have piles of mail on the counter that I was sorting and as I was pulling the stack to start throwing most of it in our recycling, a stuffed green star, the kind that hangs from Pack N-Play mobiles, fell onto the counter.
We don’t even own a Pack N-Play.
Not anymore, at least.
I gasped, and I said to myself, “No fucking way.”
I sent the email that night.
A new client presented that same week.
(^^ if you ever want help drafting a gracious “I’m out” email, just hit me up)
So, here are your Cliff’s Notes:
Believe in yourself, your vibes, your Spidey senses—always
When a client (or any) relationship gets weird, pay attention
All relationships are a mutual selection process—every day
Don’t be afraid to ask for help from whoever or whatever you believe in—God, The Universe, your higher self, the moon…
Ask for specific signs and go with the first thing that pops into your brain. I’ve had sunflowers, purple unicorns, sheaves of wheat, etc.
Remember that you’re allowed to love your work, your clients, your job, your life
You are always supported
I want you to try this trick on something small in 2023.
It could be used for beginnings, for middles, and for ends: Show me a pink rose if this project is in my highest good, show me an orange slice when it’s time to add to my Whitney Houston t-shirt collection, and so on.
Let me know how it goes!
This story originally appeared in my last newsletter of 2022.
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